Don’t brush off what you feel just because you know you’ll get through it, it’ll be over at some point, or someone else is worse off than you. That’s a really quick way to completely invalidate your experiences.
How often do you hear people say things like…
I’ll be fine.
It’s no big deal.
I shouldn’t complain.
I hear them all.the.time. And I catch myself saying them too.
What I know for sure is that often times it’s not nothing. And you’re not fine.
Using phrases like these dismisses what you’re going through. Whatever it is, big or small, you’re negating what you feel in the moment just because you know at some point you’ll be on the other side of it. Or you’re playing the comparison game with others who “have it worse,” and telling yourself your experiences shouldn’t count, they’re not bad enough, they’re not worthy of you struggling.
The fact is that sometimes things really really suck. We all go through hard, painful, scary, confusing, disappointing, heartbreaking, tiring, sad, unexpected, hurtful things.
And in those times the healthiest (and probably hardest) thing to do is to sit through the tough emotions, give attention to them, and allow yourself to feel whatever comes up. Don’t numb it, dull it down, or sweep it away.
Yes you will be okay. You will come out it. It will get better. AND right now it may be pretty awful, so it’s important that you give yourself space to feel that.
Is there a tough emotion you can give some attention to today? You deserve it. ❤️